By now you should have been served process that I’m filing for dissolution of marriage in the district of Ord Mantell.
I could say “it’s not you, it’s me” but that would be a lie, because it’s definitely you. Thankfully, Ord Mantell has no fault divorce, so I didn’t enumerate our marital problems in the petition to the court, but I wanted you to know. At least that’s what my therapist says I should do.
Mainly, you’re a chauvinist. At first it was endearing and quaint, but a few months in, suddenly you’re a domineering control freak. It was downright embarrassing to have you question and second-guess every order I give on my ship, like I’m incompetent to make decisions. That’s right, it’s my ship and you work for me. Not my problem that you found that threatening.
Do you have any idea how annoying it is having you hovering on the bridge backseat driving while I’m flying the ship? I think you actually believe the stereotype about female pilots and didn’t trust me not to crash into a moon if you weren’t there to constantly monitor me. Of course I let you fly more often than I did – it was easier than listening to your nervous yammering in my ear.
And you weren’t just controlling and condescending to me! Your sexist behavior toward Akaavi and Risha was making my life hell. I had to stop Akaavi from killing you a good dozen times. Risha was about to marry that noble dude and scoot back to her planet. Do you know how hard it is to find a good mechanic who just wants to hang out in the engine room all day?
Another sticking point in our marriage was your irrational jealousy and lack of trust. I couldn’t have a conversation with another man, even on the holo, without you popping in to chaperone and then grilling me afterward to make sure that there was nothing going on. And, god forbid, I talk to an ex-boyfriend. I’d have to hear about that for weeks. Look, you knew who I was when you married me and the number of notches on my belt. Not even the jedi can go back in time; it’s not like I could un-sleep with them. But you refused to ever let it go. It’s not like I was BSOCKing them after we were married, but to be honest, I was tempted with how you were acting.
And, by the way, watching me while I sleep is creepy. Like sparkle-vampire creepy.
Anyway, I hope you find happiness with someone else, though I’d implore you to get some counseling or therapy so you don’t end up in divorce court again.
P.S. It goes without saying that you’re also fired.