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Have you ever spent any amount of time on the fleet? If so, you’ve seen the fashions and the names that make you throw up a little in your mouth. This page is dedicated to those fashions (and names) – captured by me and submitted by readers.
Click the category headings to show images. Click pictures to embiggen… if you dare.
Bikini, Underboob, and Sideboob
Falling into a tank of pepto bismol is a real danger on the fleet.
I just do not GET these weird half-pant-things. Maybe she peed her pants.
Obviously if you dress with a veil over your eyes, you might not get a good result.
I spy with my little eye, someone who is dressed better than I (literally ANYONE else).
This is so typical of fleetwear, I wonder why I bothered to add it to the gallery.
I thought nothing could clash worse with blue skin. I was incorrect.
Matching pants to hair… at least she’s wearing pants if nothing else useful. Please aim here at my uncovered organs.
I’d wear a mask to obscure my identity too if I were wearing that.
Underboob without pants is catching on
Looks totally bizarre from this angle
Looks like she ran butt-first into a large spiderweb.
Stop with the (furry) boob already!
See, here are my organs. Please stab them. I don’t need them anyway.
To add insult to injury, no pants with the underboob.
Where is this giant gun attached?
Do not wear red if you are green. Someone might try to hang ornaments on you.
Why is it that bikinis go with Barbie hair more often than not (seriously, you will notice this everywhere)
The. Shoes.
Leaf butt is dumb enough without a bikini
I don’t think “Evil” goes well with “blueberry.”
Let’s overcompensate for lack of armor with the monster utility belt. (Not blue batman..)
Where is that attached?
But spray tans are so HOT with my green suit. I’m gonna win that bodybuilding competition.
I have absolutely no idea where the “holster” is for this gun.
Pants?
We have a serious galactic problem – namely a pants shortage.
Honey? Where are my paaaants?
I’m a barbie girl, in a barbie world. My boobs are plastic. It’s fantastic!
I call this one “S&M Barbie on a Lizard”
Totally a miniskirt… right guys? Right? Why are you laughing at me?
Weird bikini pants don’t count as pants.
It’s like a squirrel with a bushy tail.
Overly protective boots won’t save you when you’re not wearing pants, or any covering for your organs.
Pants shortages are everywhere!
The dye job just looks like pubes.
It looks like she’s got no top on and the bottoms look like pubes!
Did her underpants grow a cape?
Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a flasher!
Looks like she peed her pants blue.
This just looks like pubes. Dye fail.
Wax? Please.
This coat doesn’t keep me warm at ALL.
A terrible bee. Bzzt.
Looks like the superhero, Candy Cane Vomit.
This might be a zebra.
My jacket zipper is stuck my zipper is… ah screw it.
Be vewy quiet, i’m hunting wabbits… why are they laughing at me?
So close to a good outfit. Just wear pants.
What the eff is THIS?
Note the belt-shaped gap in the middle.
Looks like she was undressing and then got distracted and left the jacket half on.
I still can’t figure out what those weird flaps on the front are supposed to be.
If you wear this on a tauntaun, there will be chafing. Be warned.
Are garters that hold up nothing like a bridge to nowhere?
I think she missed the point of wearing long boots in the tall grass to avoid ticks.
Feels a little breezy in here…
Please wear pants if you’re going so sit like that
Stupid Hats
(and other poor fashion choices)
Matching will not save you from a terribad hat.
I promise I won’t wear it with THAT outfit.
The mullet of outfits. Party on top, business on bottom.
My friend calls this hat a “vagina.” Now I can’t wear it. Ever. Thanks.
Antlers? Really?
Consular Fail, a study in bananahands and lemonhat.
No, guys, it’s NOT a boomerang. It’s a totally legitimate hat…
Terrible Dyes, Naked Dyes, and Hair Dye
I’d be ashamed if I were naked in public too.
Color Fail
Red and purple is a trap.
This looks like a booger.
I did a double take on this one – it looked like she was topless for a second there!
Do not dye your hair to match your clothes.
And an um.. nakeder xmas tree.
Harley Quinn, the bee.
Christmas tree, complete with lights.
Flashers… again.
Just because a dye kit exists, that doesn’t make it a good idea. Also, HAT!
Friends don’t let friends dye their armor creamsicle.
Boys Behaving Badly
Legolas tries to go metrosexual and fails.
This cat just looks… weird.
The smile really sells this outfit.
Whatever party they’re going to, I want an invitation.
At least he commits to his theme.
My girlfriend said I’d look SO HOT as an imperial schoolgirl.
Not wealthy enough for a shirt.
Companion Punishment and other Groups of Morons
The creamsicle duo.
Seriously Ew.
At least the name matches.
Ew
Do these remind you of baboon butts?
I wonder what Doc did to deserve this punishment. He’s no Quinn.
Superhero secret power: flashing
Companions should go on strike.
Do not wear only one piece of glowing gear. It looks stupid.
Redrum!
Kira and Akaavi are not amused.
Clearly Nadia offended her jedi teacher.
These two also have problems with finding pants.
I must get this dye kit to punish Quinn.
But it takes 3 to be really creepy.
Clipping Disasters, Cyborfail, and other Miscellaneous Bad
Not only is this stupid, it clips.
She’s dancing for her meow mix.
Mixed messages: sexy top, no genitals.
It completely ruins the effect with that awful clipping.
Is that weird pink flap supposed to match?
Silly Names
Because nobody has thought of THAT one before.
Too high to spell.
More like undead legend.
Yes, yes, you’re sexy in your underboob.
An example of a default from-the-trainer dye. You do not want to be making this one. Bleh.
