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Have you ever spent any amount of time on the fleet? If so, you’ve seen the fashions and the names that make you throw up a little in your mouth. This page is dedicated to those fashions (and names) – captured by me and submitted by readers.
Click the category headings to show images. Click pictures to embiggen… if you dare.
Bikini, Underboob, and Sideboob
Why is it that bikinis go with Barbie hair more often than not (seriously, you will notice this everywhere)
But spray tans are so HOT with my green suit. I’m gonna win that bodybuilding competition.
Let’s overcompensate for lack of armor with the monster utility belt. (Not blue batman..)
I have absolutely no idea where the “holster” is for this gun.
The. Shoes.
Leaf butt is dumb enough without a bikini
Matching pants to hair… at least she’s wearing pants if nothing else useful. Please aim here at my uncovered organs.
I don’t think “Evil” goes well with “blueberry.”
Obviously if you dress with a veil over your eyes, you might not get a good result.
Looks like she ran butt-first into a large spiderweb.
This is so typical of fleetwear, I wonder why I bothered to add it to the gallery.
I’d wear a mask to obscure my identity too if I were wearing that.
Underboob without pants is catching on
See, here are my organs. Please stab them. I don’t need them anyway.
I spy with my little eye, someone who is dressed better than I (literally ANYONE else).
Stop with the (furry) boob already!
Looks totally bizarre from this angle
Where is this giant gun attached?
Where is that attached?
Falling into a tank of pepto bismol is a real danger on the fleet.
I thought nothing could clash worse with blue skin. I was incorrect.
I just do not GET these weird half-pant-things. Maybe she peed her pants.
To add insult to injury, no pants with the underboob.
Do not wear red if you are green. Someone might try to hang ornaments on you.
Pants?
We have a serious galactic problem – namely a pants shortage.
Honey? Where are my paaaants?
Pants shortages are everywhere!
Looks like she was undressing and then got distracted and left the jacket half on.
My jacket zipper is stuck my zipper is… ah screw it.
Note the belt-shaped gap in the middle.
Are garters that hold up nothing like a bridge to nowhere?
If you wear this on a tauntaun, there will be chafing. Be warned.
Looks like the superhero, Candy Cane Vomit.
So close to a good outfit. Just wear pants.
This coat doesn’t keep me warm at ALL.
It’s like a squirrel with a bushy tail.
I think she missed the point of wearing long boots in the tall grass to avoid ticks.
I call this one “S&M Barbie on a Lizard”
Overly protective boots won’t save you when you’re not wearing pants, or any covering for your organs.
This just looks like pubes. Dye fail.
Feels a little breezy in here…
Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a flasher!
Be vewy quiet, i’m hunting wabbits… why are they laughing at me?
What the eff is THIS?
I’m a barbie girl, in a barbie world. My boobs are plastic. It’s fantastic!
The dye job just looks like pubes.
This might be a zebra.
Looks like she peed her pants blue.
A terrible bee. Bzzt.
It looks like she’s got no top on and the bottoms look like pubes!
Totally a miniskirt… right guys? Right? Why are you laughing at me?
Wax? Please.
I still can’t figure out what those weird flaps on the front are supposed to be.
Please wear pants if you’re going so sit like that
Weird bikini pants don’t count as pants.
Did her underpants grow a cape?
Stupid Hats
(and other poor fashion choices)
Consular Fail, a study in bananahands and lemonhat.
I promise I won’t wear it with THAT outfit.
Antlers? Really?
No, guys, it’s NOT a boomerang. It’s a totally legitimate hat…
My friend calls this hat a “vagina.” Now I can’t wear it. Ever. Thanks.
Matching will not save you from a terribad hat.
The mullet of outfits. Party on top, business on bottom.
Terrible Dyes, Naked Dyes, and Hair Dye
And an um.. nakeder xmas tree.
Flashers… again.
I’d be ashamed if I were naked in public too.
I did a double take on this one – it looked like she was topless for a second there!
Color Fail
Friends don’t let friends dye their armor creamsicle.
Red and purple is a trap.
Just because a dye kit exists, that doesn’t make it a good idea. Also, HAT!
Do not dye your hair to match your clothes.
Harley Quinn, the bee.
Christmas tree, complete with lights.
This looks like a booger.
Boys Behaving Badly
My girlfriend said I’d look SO HOT as an imperial schoolgirl.
Whatever party they’re going to, I want an invitation.
At least he commits to his theme.
Not wealthy enough for a shirt.
The smile really sells this outfit.
Legolas tries to go metrosexual and fails.
This cat just looks… weird.
Companion Punishment and other Groups of Morons
Do these remind you of baboon butts?
These two also have problems with finding pants.
Ew
The creamsicle duo.
Do not wear only one piece of glowing gear. It looks stupid.
I must get this dye kit to punish Quinn.
Kira and Akaavi are not amused.
Superhero secret power: flashing
Seriously Ew.
At least the name matches.
Companions should go on strike.
I wonder what Doc did to deserve this punishment. He’s no Quinn.
Clearly Nadia offended her jedi teacher.
But it takes 3 to be really creepy.
Redrum!
Clipping Disasters, Cyborfail, and other Miscellaneous Bad
Not only is this stupid, it clips.
She’s dancing for her meow mix.
It completely ruins the effect with that awful clipping.
Is that weird pink flap supposed to match?
Mixed messages: sexy top, no genitals.
Silly Names
Bad clothes, bad name, bad hat. My brain hurts.
Because nobody has thought of THAT one before.
I don’t even know what that is supposed to mean.
An example of a default from-the-trainer dye. You do not want to be making this one. Bleh.