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Have you ever spent any amount of time on the fleet? If so, you’ve seen the fashions and the names that make you throw up a little in your mouth. This page is dedicated to those fashions (and names) – captured by me and submitted by readers.
Click the category headings to show images. Click pictures to embiggen… if you dare.
Bikini, Underboob, and Sideboob
Leaf butt is dumb enough without a bikini
Looks totally bizarre from this angle
See, here are my organs. Please stab them. I don’t need them anyway.
Obviously if you dress with a veil over your eyes, you might not get a good result.
The. Shoes.
I spy with my little eye, someone who is dressed better than I (literally ANYONE else).
This is so typical of fleetwear, I wonder why I bothered to add it to the gallery.
Looks like she ran butt-first into a large spiderweb.
I just do not GET these weird half-pant-things. Maybe she peed her pants.
Falling into a tank of pepto bismol is a real danger on the fleet.
Where is this giant gun attached?
I thought nothing could clash worse with blue skin. I was incorrect.
Where is that attached?
Let’s overcompensate for lack of armor with the monster utility belt. (Not blue batman..)
I’d wear a mask to obscure my identity too if I were wearing that.
I don’t think “Evil” goes well with “blueberry.”
To add insult to injury, no pants with the underboob.
Stop with the (furry) boob already!
Matching pants to hair… at least she’s wearing pants if nothing else useful. Please aim here at my uncovered organs.
Underboob without pants is catching on
Why is it that bikinis go with Barbie hair more often than not (seriously, you will notice this everywhere)
But spray tans are so HOT with my green suit. I’m gonna win that bodybuilding competition.
Do not wear red if you are green. Someone might try to hang ornaments on you.
I have absolutely no idea where the “holster” is for this gun.
Pants?
We have a serious galactic problem – namely a pants shortage.
Honey? Where are my paaaants?
It’s like a squirrel with a bushy tail.
Be vewy quiet, i’m hunting wabbits… why are they laughing at me?
Weird bikini pants don’t count as pants.
A terrible bee. Bzzt.
Wax? Please.
Looks like she peed her pants blue.
My jacket zipper is stuck my zipper is… ah screw it.
If you wear this on a tauntaun, there will be chafing. Be warned.
Did her underpants grow a cape?
I think she missed the point of wearing long boots in the tall grass to avoid ticks.
Looks like the superhero, Candy Cane Vomit.
So close to a good outfit. Just wear pants.
Looks like she was undressing and then got distracted and left the jacket half on.
Are garters that hold up nothing like a bridge to nowhere?
It looks like she’s got no top on and the bottoms look like pubes!
What the eff is THIS?
This might be a zebra.
Note the belt-shaped gap in the middle.
Overly protective boots won’t save you when you’re not wearing pants, or any covering for your organs.
This coat doesn’t keep me warm at ALL.
I call this one “S&M Barbie on a Lizard”
Pants shortages are everywhere!
Please wear pants if you’re going so sit like that
Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a flasher!
Feels a little breezy in here…
This just looks like pubes. Dye fail.
I’m a barbie girl, in a barbie world. My boobs are plastic. It’s fantastic!
The dye job just looks like pubes.
I still can’t figure out what those weird flaps on the front are supposed to be.
Totally a miniskirt… right guys? Right? Why are you laughing at me?
Stupid Hats
(and other poor fashion choices)
My friend calls this hat a “vagina.” Now I can’t wear it. Ever. Thanks.
I promise I won’t wear it with THAT outfit.
Consular Fail, a study in bananahands and lemonhat.
Antlers? Really?
Matching will not save you from a terribad hat.
No, guys, it’s NOT a boomerang. It’s a totally legitimate hat…
The mullet of outfits. Party on top, business on bottom.
Terrible Dyes, Naked Dyes, and Hair Dye
Color Fail
Flashers… again.
Christmas tree, complete with lights.
And an um.. nakeder xmas tree.
Friends don’t let friends dye their armor creamsicle.
I did a double take on this one – it looked like she was topless for a second there!
Do not dye your hair to match your clothes.
Red and purple is a trap.
This looks like a booger.
Just because a dye kit exists, that doesn’t make it a good idea. Also, HAT!
Harley Quinn, the bee.
I’d be ashamed if I were naked in public too.
Boys Behaving Badly
This cat just looks… weird.
Whatever party they’re going to, I want an invitation.
Not wealthy enough for a shirt.
My girlfriend said I’d look SO HOT as an imperial schoolgirl.
The smile really sells this outfit.
Legolas tries to go metrosexual and fails.
At least he commits to his theme.
Companion Punishment and other Groups of Morons
Ew
At least the name matches.
These two also have problems with finding pants.
Kira and Akaavi are not amused.
Do not wear only one piece of glowing gear. It looks stupid.
Clearly Nadia offended her jedi teacher.
But it takes 3 to be really creepy.
The creamsicle duo.
Do these remind you of baboon butts?
Seriously Ew.
I must get this dye kit to punish Quinn.
Superhero secret power: flashing
Redrum!
Companions should go on strike.
I wonder what Doc did to deserve this punishment. He’s no Quinn.
Clipping Disasters, Cyborfail, and other Miscellaneous Bad
She’s dancing for her meow mix.
It completely ruins the effect with that awful clipping.
Mixed messages: sexy top, no genitals.
Is that weird pink flap supposed to match?
Not only is this stupid, it clips.
Silly Names
An example of a default from-the-trainer dye. You do not want to be making this one. Bleh.