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Have you ever spent any amount of time on the fleet? If so, you’ve seen the fashions and the names that make you throw up a little in your mouth. This page is dedicated to those fashions (and names) – captured by me and submitted by readers.
Click the category headings to show images. Click pictures to embiggen… if you dare.
Bikini, Underboob, and Sideboob
Stop with the (furry) boob already!
I spy with my little eye, someone who is dressed better than I (literally ANYONE else).
But spray tans are so HOT with my green suit. I’m gonna win that bodybuilding competition.
I just do not GET these weird half-pant-things. Maybe she peed her pants.
See, here are my organs. Please stab them. I don’t need them anyway.
Leaf butt is dumb enough without a bikini
I have absolutely no idea where the “holster” is for this gun.
Where is this giant gun attached?
I don’t think “Evil” goes well with “blueberry.”
Where is that attached?
Do not wear red if you are green. Someone might try to hang ornaments on you.
Let’s overcompensate for lack of armor with the monster utility belt. (Not blue batman..)
I thought nothing could clash worse with blue skin. I was incorrect.
Looks totally bizarre from this angle
Obviously if you dress with a veil over your eyes, you might not get a good result.
Why is it that bikinis go with Barbie hair more often than not (seriously, you will notice this everywhere)
The. Shoes.
I’d wear a mask to obscure my identity too if I were wearing that.
Underboob without pants is catching on
To add insult to injury, no pants with the underboob.
This is so typical of fleetwear, I wonder why I bothered to add it to the gallery.
Falling into a tank of pepto bismol is a real danger on the fleet.
Matching pants to hair… at least she’s wearing pants if nothing else useful. Please aim here at my uncovered organs.
Looks like she ran butt-first into a large spiderweb.
Pants?
We have a serious galactic problem – namely a pants shortage.
Honey? Where are my paaaants?
It’s like a squirrel with a bushy tail.
I’m a barbie girl, in a barbie world. My boobs are plastic. It’s fantastic!
A terrible bee. Bzzt.
Looks like she was undressing and then got distracted and left the jacket half on.
Looks like she peed her pants blue.
My jacket zipper is stuck my zipper is… ah screw it.
Looks like the superhero, Candy Cane Vomit.
Overly protective boots won’t save you when you’re not wearing pants, or any covering for your organs.
This coat doesn’t keep me warm at ALL.
I call this one “S&M Barbie on a Lizard”
Wax? Please.
If you wear this on a tauntaun, there will be chafing. Be warned.
Did her underpants grow a cape?
This just looks like pubes. Dye fail.
Weird bikini pants don’t count as pants.
What the eff is THIS?
So close to a good outfit. Just wear pants.
Be vewy quiet, i’m hunting wabbits… why are they laughing at me?
It looks like she’s got no top on and the bottoms look like pubes!
Feels a little breezy in here…
Pants shortages are everywhere!
Note the belt-shaped gap in the middle.
I think she missed the point of wearing long boots in the tall grass to avoid ticks.
Totally a miniskirt… right guys? Right? Why are you laughing at me?
I still can’t figure out what those weird flaps on the front are supposed to be.
The dye job just looks like pubes.
Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a flasher!
This might be a zebra.
Please wear pants if you’re going so sit like that
Are garters that hold up nothing like a bridge to nowhere?
Stupid Hats
(and other poor fashion choices)
Antlers? Really?
Consular Fail, a study in bananahands and lemonhat.
My friend calls this hat a “vagina.” Now I can’t wear it. Ever. Thanks.
Matching will not save you from a terribad hat.
I promise I won’t wear it with THAT outfit.
No, guys, it’s NOT a boomerang. It’s a totally legitimate hat…
The mullet of outfits. Party on top, business on bottom.
Terrible Dyes, Naked Dyes, and Hair Dye
Harley Quinn, the bee.
Flashers… again.
Just because a dye kit exists, that doesn’t make it a good idea. Also, HAT!
Christmas tree, complete with lights.
I did a double take on this one – it looked like she was topless for a second there!
I’d be ashamed if I were naked in public too.
This looks like a booger.
Friends don’t let friends dye their armor creamsicle.
Red and purple is a trap.
Color Fail
Do not dye your hair to match your clothes.
And an um.. nakeder xmas tree.
Boys Behaving Badly
My girlfriend said I’d look SO HOT as an imperial schoolgirl.
Legolas tries to go metrosexual and fails.
Not wealthy enough for a shirt.
The smile really sells this outfit.
Whatever party they’re going to, I want an invitation.
At least he commits to his theme.
This cat just looks… weird.
Companion Punishment and other Groups of Morons
The creamsicle duo.
But it takes 3 to be really creepy.
Ew
Superhero secret power: flashing
Companions should go on strike.
Do these remind you of baboon butts?
Seriously Ew.
Clearly Nadia offended her jedi teacher.
I must get this dye kit to punish Quinn.
These two also have problems with finding pants.
Kira and Akaavi are not amused.
Redrum!
Do not wear only one piece of glowing gear. It looks stupid.
I wonder what Doc did to deserve this punishment. He’s no Quinn.
At least the name matches.
Clipping Disasters, Cyborfail, and other Miscellaneous Bad
Mixed messages: sexy top, no genitals.
She’s dancing for her meow mix.
Not only is this stupid, it clips.
Is that weird pink flap supposed to match?
It completely ruins the effect with that awful clipping.
Silly Names
Worst Guild Name Ever.
Ew. Seriously. Ew.
I don’t even know what that is supposed to mean.
Original. Scourgey scourge scourge.
An example of a default from-the-trainer dye. You do not want to be making this one. Bleh.