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Have you ever spent any amount of time on the fleet? If so, you’ve seen the fashions and the names that make you throw up a little in your mouth. This page is dedicated to those fashions (and names) – captured by me and submitted by readers.
Click the category headings to show images. Click pictures to embiggen… if you dare.
Bikini, Underboob, and Sideboob
Where is this giant gun attached?
This is so typical of fleetwear, I wonder why I bothered to add it to the gallery.
Falling into a tank of pepto bismol is a real danger on the fleet.
Underboob without pants is catching on
Where is that attached?
I spy with my little eye, someone who is dressed better than I (literally ANYONE else).
I’d wear a mask to obscure my identity too if I were wearing that.
Do not wear red if you are green. Someone might try to hang ornaments on you.
I don’t think “Evil” goes well with “blueberry.”
Let’s overcompensate for lack of armor with the monster utility belt. (Not blue batman..)
See, here are my organs. Please stab them. I don’t need them anyway.
Looks totally bizarre from this angle
Stop with the (furry) boob already!
I have absolutely no idea where the “holster” is for this gun.
To add insult to injury, no pants with the underboob.
Why is it that bikinis go with Barbie hair more often than not (seriously, you will notice this everywhere)
I just do not GET these weird half-pant-things. Maybe she peed her pants.
Looks like she ran butt-first into a large spiderweb.
Leaf butt is dumb enough without a bikini
Matching pants to hair… at least she’s wearing pants if nothing else useful. Please aim here at my uncovered organs.
The. Shoes.
Obviously if you dress with a veil over your eyes, you might not get a good result.
I thought nothing could clash worse with blue skin. I was incorrect.
But spray tans are so HOT with my green suit. I’m gonna win that bodybuilding competition.
Pants?
We have a serious galactic problem – namely a pants shortage.
Honey? Where are my paaaants?
This coat doesn’t keep me warm at ALL.
So close to a good outfit. Just wear pants.
Please wear pants if you’re going so sit like that
I call this one “S&M Barbie on a Lizard”
A terrible bee. Bzzt.
Feels a little breezy in here…
Did her underpants grow a cape?
Weird bikini pants don’t count as pants.
This just looks like pubes. Dye fail.
It looks like she’s got no top on and the bottoms look like pubes!
Totally a miniskirt… right guys? Right? Why are you laughing at me?
Looks like she peed her pants blue.
Be vewy quiet, i’m hunting wabbits… why are they laughing at me?
What the eff is THIS?
Note the belt-shaped gap in the middle.
If you wear this on a tauntaun, there will be chafing. Be warned.
I think she missed the point of wearing long boots in the tall grass to avoid ticks.
It’s like a squirrel with a bushy tail.
Pants shortages are everywhere!
Are garters that hold up nothing like a bridge to nowhere?
Looks like she was undressing and then got distracted and left the jacket half on.
I still can’t figure out what those weird flaps on the front are supposed to be.
This might be a zebra.
My jacket zipper is stuck my zipper is… ah screw it.
Looks like the superhero, Candy Cane Vomit.
Overly protective boots won’t save you when you’re not wearing pants, or any covering for your organs.
Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a flasher!
I’m a barbie girl, in a barbie world. My boobs are plastic. It’s fantastic!
The dye job just looks like pubes.
Wax? Please.
Stupid Hats
(and other poor fashion choices)
Antlers? Really?
The mullet of outfits. Party on top, business on bottom.
I promise I won’t wear it with THAT outfit.
Matching will not save you from a terribad hat.
No, guys, it’s NOT a boomerang. It’s a totally legitimate hat…
My friend calls this hat a “vagina.” Now I can’t wear it. Ever. Thanks.
Consular Fail, a study in bananahands and lemonhat.
Terrible Dyes, Naked Dyes, and Hair Dye
Just because a dye kit exists, that doesn’t make it a good idea. Also, HAT!
This looks like a booger.
I did a double take on this one – it looked like she was topless for a second there!
I’d be ashamed if I were naked in public too.
Color Fail
And an um.. nakeder xmas tree.
Friends don’t let friends dye their armor creamsicle.
Harley Quinn, the bee.
Christmas tree, complete with lights.
Flashers… again.
Red and purple is a trap.
Do not dye your hair to match your clothes.
Boys Behaving Badly
Whatever party they’re going to, I want an invitation.
Not wealthy enough for a shirt.
This cat just looks… weird.
My girlfriend said I’d look SO HOT as an imperial schoolgirl.
The smile really sells this outfit.
Legolas tries to go metrosexual and fails.
At least he commits to his theme.
Companion Punishment and other Groups of Morons
Companions should go on strike.
Do not wear only one piece of glowing gear. It looks stupid.
Superhero secret power: flashing
The creamsicle duo.
But it takes 3 to be really creepy.
Clearly Nadia offended her jedi teacher.
Ew
Seriously Ew.
Do these remind you of baboon butts?
These two also have problems with finding pants.
Redrum!
At least the name matches.
I wonder what Doc did to deserve this punishment. He’s no Quinn.
Kira and Akaavi are not amused.
I must get this dye kit to punish Quinn.
Clipping Disasters, Cyborfail, and other Miscellaneous Bad
It completely ruins the effect with that awful clipping.
She’s dancing for her meow mix.
Is that weird pink flap supposed to match?
Mixed messages: sexy top, no genitals.
Not only is this stupid, it clips.
Silly Names
Yes, yes, you’re sexy in your underboob.
Apparently they have a republic division.
I don’t even know what that is supposed to mean.
I guess he’s a lord. Lordy lord lord.
Good for her, I mean him. Crap.
Nobody Puts Her In A Corner
Worst Guild Name Ever.
Were the proper spellings taken?
I don’t know what a spacefrog is.
Of the “Sucks” legacy. That part is accurate.
Ew. Seriously. Ew.
Original. Scourgey scourge scourge.
Because nobody has thought of THAT one before.
Too high to spell.
An example of a default from-the-trainer dye. You do not want to be making this one. Bleh.
