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Have you ever spent any amount of time on the fleet? If so, you’ve seen the fashions and the names that make you throw up a little in your mouth. This page is dedicated to those fashions (and names) – captured by me and submitted by readers.
Click the category headings to show images. Click pictures to embiggen… if you dare.
Bikini, Underboob, and Sideboob
Underboob without pants is catching on
Why is it that bikinis go with Barbie hair more often than not (seriously, you will notice this everywhere)
Matching pants to hair… at least she’s wearing pants if nothing else useful. Please aim here at my uncovered organs.
This is so typical of fleetwear, I wonder why I bothered to add it to the gallery.
Leaf butt is dumb enough without a bikini
The. Shoes.
I thought nothing could clash worse with blue skin. I was incorrect.
Falling into a tank of pepto bismol is a real danger on the fleet.
Stop with the (furry) boob already!
I don’t think “Evil” goes well with “blueberry.”
Do not wear red if you are green. Someone might try to hang ornaments on you.
I spy with my little eye, someone who is dressed better than I (literally ANYONE else).
I’d wear a mask to obscure my identity too if I were wearing that.
Where is that attached?
See, here are my organs. Please stab them. I don’t need them anyway.
To add insult to injury, no pants with the underboob.
Obviously if you dress with a veil over your eyes, you might not get a good result.
I just do not GET these weird half-pant-things. Maybe she peed her pants.
But spray tans are so HOT with my green suit. I’m gonna win that bodybuilding competition.
Looks like she ran butt-first into a large spiderweb.
Looks totally bizarre from this angle
Where is this giant gun attached?
Let’s overcompensate for lack of armor with the monster utility belt. (Not blue batman..)
I have absolutely no idea where the “holster” is for this gun.
Pants?
We have a serious galactic problem – namely a pants shortage.
Honey? Where are my paaaants?
This coat doesn’t keep me warm at ALL.
Looks like she was undressing and then got distracted and left the jacket half on.
Did her underpants grow a cape?
So close to a good outfit. Just wear pants.
I think she missed the point of wearing long boots in the tall grass to avoid ticks.
I call this one “S&M Barbie on a Lizard”
I’m a barbie girl, in a barbie world. My boobs are plastic. It’s fantastic!
A terrible bee. Bzzt.
Please wear pants if you’re going so sit like that
It’s like a squirrel with a bushy tail.
Be vewy quiet, i’m hunting wabbits… why are they laughing at me?
This just looks like pubes. Dye fail.
This might be a zebra.
Looks like the superhero, Candy Cane Vomit.
My jacket zipper is stuck my zipper is… ah screw it.
It looks like she’s got no top on and the bottoms look like pubes!
Note the belt-shaped gap in the middle.
If you wear this on a tauntaun, there will be chafing. Be warned.
Are garters that hold up nothing like a bridge to nowhere?
Feels a little breezy in here…
The dye job just looks like pubes.
Weird bikini pants don’t count as pants.
Wax? Please.
Looks like she peed her pants blue.
I still can’t figure out what those weird flaps on the front are supposed to be.
Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a flasher!
Pants shortages are everywhere!
Totally a miniskirt… right guys? Right? Why are you laughing at me?
What the eff is THIS?
Overly protective boots won’t save you when you’re not wearing pants, or any covering for your organs.
Stupid Hats
(and other poor fashion choices)
No, guys, it’s NOT a boomerang. It’s a totally legitimate hat…
My friend calls this hat a “vagina.” Now I can’t wear it. Ever. Thanks.
The mullet of outfits. Party on top, business on bottom.
Matching will not save you from a terribad hat.
I promise I won’t wear it with THAT outfit.
Antlers? Really?
Consular Fail, a study in bananahands and lemonhat.
Terrible Dyes, Naked Dyes, and Hair Dye
I did a double take on this one – it looked like she was topless for a second there!
Harley Quinn, the bee.
I’d be ashamed if I were naked in public too.
Flashers… again.
This looks like a booger.
And an um.. nakeder xmas tree.
Do not dye your hair to match your clothes.
Just because a dye kit exists, that doesn’t make it a good idea. Also, HAT!
Color Fail
Christmas tree, complete with lights.
Friends don’t let friends dye their armor creamsicle.
Red and purple is a trap.
Boys Behaving Badly
The smile really sells this outfit.
My girlfriend said I’d look SO HOT as an imperial schoolgirl.
This cat just looks… weird.
Legolas tries to go metrosexual and fails.
At least he commits to his theme.
Not wealthy enough for a shirt.
Whatever party they’re going to, I want an invitation.
Companion Punishment and other Groups of Morons
Seriously Ew.
Clearly Nadia offended her jedi teacher.
Do not wear only one piece of glowing gear. It looks stupid.
Companions should go on strike.
These two also have problems with finding pants.
I wonder what Doc did to deserve this punishment. He’s no Quinn.
Ew
Redrum!
The creamsicle duo.
At least the name matches.
But it takes 3 to be really creepy.
Kira and Akaavi are not amused.
Do these remind you of baboon butts?
I must get this dye kit to punish Quinn.
Superhero secret power: flashing
Clipping Disasters, Cyborfail, and other Miscellaneous Bad
She’s dancing for her meow mix.
Is that weird pink flap supposed to match?
Not only is this stupid, it clips.
Mixed messages: sexy top, no genitals.
It completely ruins the effect with that awful clipping.
Silly Names
Bad clothes, bad name, bad hat. My brain hurts.
Of the “Sucks” legacy. That part is accurate.
Because nobody has thought of THAT one before.
An example of a default from-the-trainer dye. You do not want to be making this one. Bleh.
